Thursday, May 21, 2009

I'm Buddhist And Proud Of It!!

Today I am officially freeing myself. Actually, I was free all along, but I was not walking and living it. I was afraid to step out and be honest about who I really am.

Because if I was totally honest, I might be setting myself up to have to defend my own personal beliefs.

What? Is that crazy? Defend them to who?

It's stupid. That's what it is!

What I found myself doing was always appending to my proclamation of being a Buddhist practioner, that I was Christian raised (a believer), but for the last fifteen years, have also been a student of the Buddha.

Huh?

Why did I feel for the need to add or explain? And what does that all mean?

More importantly, who cares?!

And yet, I did it. Because who the hell has ever heard of a Mexican-Amercian Buddhist? "Aren't all Mexicans Catholic anyway?" was what I was afraid I would be asked.

Once again, who cares?

Was it my fear of being Mexican-American? No. Not Catholic? No. Or that I didn't perceive myself as being normal? Maybe.

And what the hell is normal anyway?

I certainly don't know!

Or was I just afraid I would not be accepted? Or possibly even judged?


Huh? Who's judging? Maybe...self?

If anyone else came to me and shared that they had these same thoughts, I would look at them and ask, "Why does it matter if you are Buddhist, Catholic, or whatever?"

I would encourage them to be their own person.

So, today, this stupid stuff ends. And it ends with me.

Being Buddhist has made me I believe a better mother, wife, friend, and yes, person.

Who cares what anyone thinks?

I am certain that no one was sitting around and wondering, "What is Dianna? Catholic? Muslim? Buddhist?"

No one other than my own ego. My own idea of self kept me prisoner. A prisoner in my mind only. Time to let go of this silly attachment and the suffering it has caused!

Get behind me Dianna (ego)!

I am one happy Buddhist! I am freeeeeeeeeeeee!

Saturday, May 16, 2009

Shameless Plug

Here is a shameless plug for one of the many blogs my husband writes. I am so proud of him and his ability to speak his mind freely. Through him I have learned the power that exists in writing.

www.nomorerace.blogspot.com

Monday, May 4, 2009

Safe To Share

I think it is safe now to share what crazy, zany, and off-the-wall idea my husband had recently. And yes, I went along, so I guess that makes me just as loony.

Earnest signed us up to audition to be on a television show that was casting here locally in LA for couples. We auditioned last week. The name of the show is called "Crash Course" and it is produced by the same people at ABC's show "WipeOut."

The object of the show is for couples to compete against other couples performing car stunts for a BIG cash price. The producers of the show come up with crazy car stunts and the couples take turns attempting to perform the stunts.

Just for the record, I'm not a good driver and I am an awful passenger, especially when I ride shot gun. I drive my husband nuts! (Literally!) The Latina in me comes out and it is nerve wrecking I am told. To his credit, Earnest tunes me out except for those awkward looks he gives me when I flinch or brace myself suddenly while he is driving.

He loves to remind me that he has never had a car accident in the 30 plus years he has been driving. Me, on the other hand, well...

So, we made it to the next round of auditions and then it hit us. Maybe we should wait until the second season of the show so we can find out if this new show makes people look like idiots the way they do on "WipeOut." God knows, we don't need any help in that department. We are entertaining enough without a camera on us!

Needless to say, it was fun auditioning and getting away for a few hours alone with my husband.

I'm just not sure I really want to get in a moving vehicle, attempt a crazy car stunt and lose my wits and start cursing in Spanish in front of millions of people watching just to (possibly) win money.

I'm not that crazy, or am I?