Sad thing was, I put it out in the universe and my husband picked it up.
I was in one of those reflective moods and I mentioned to my husband that I wished I had made better choices/decisions in my younger years.
My husband sat there for a beat and then asked, "You know that if you had, we might not be sitting here together right now?"
I sat there baffled for a moment. Contemplating exactly what my husband was saying and where he was going with his train of thought.
He went on to add, "If you had, we might not have ever met nor have had the wonderful children we've been blessed with."
Again, I sat there quietly wondering what my life would be without my children and my husband. And a sadness came over me. Tears (which I tried to hide from my husband) began to well up in my eyes and I got a big knot in my stomach. My heart felt as if it were being torn apart and ripped right out of me!
Immediately, I repented of such foolishness! (Silently in my heart to God!)
As I sat there and thought about it more, I could not help but honestly ask myself, "Really Dianna? What would you have done differently?"
More importantly, how crazy is it to live in a world of woulda, coulda, shouldas? It is what it is! Get over yourself Dianna!
Somebody slap me!!!
As my husband and I talked more about these 'choices/decisions' it was apparent to both of us that it was just OLD GUILT that I was still lugging around weighing me down. Guilt that was keeping me from TOTALLY moving forward. It wasn't the decisions at all!
Ah, the mind can play such silly tricks on us if we are not diligent and fully mindful.
Silly old me! I am feeling much lighter today!
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